Uncertainty and German

I know not a desired topic to write about for today’s essay, thus I will write about how much it pains me to be so suddenly uncertain of something that I generally am, most of the time, certain about.

Certainty allows one to feel as though they are in a state of absolution, in a false state where nothing can go wrong and everything flows rather smoothly and on track. All impediments immediately vanish in the face of certainty, and a clear sky of absolution begins to form, with the bright rays of positivity stroking one’s face, reassuring one that they ought not to worry at all.

Along comes uncertainty, and it waves its hundreds of hands around and muddles all that was almost set in soothing, familiar stone. Uncertainty lands with both feet and scurries around your once clean deck, dropping crushed barnacles and mollusks, and you sit there fretting about when and if you will ever get the chance to be able to clean your pirate ship of destiny if ever uncertainty leaves. But uncertainty is quite a nosey visitor. It enjoys remaining when unwanted, even more than it would enjoy being expected and wanted at a place.

You try for hours, days, weeks, years to remove uncertainty but it is bound to your lifestyle like a large iron statue. It has carved itself on your spine and it will not cease to exist until it chooses to. You have no say in this matter, in fact you must sit there and comply as it ruins what you have so dearly accumulated. You are powerless, envious at how much power it has acquired over you in such a small amount of time and with no effort. Uncertainty, so it seems, is more certain than you are at this stage, and the irony blazes through your mind like a cannonball.

So how then, does one rid themselves of this clingy thing that is uncertainty? Well, they may begin by choosing to ignore the obstacles it tries to place in their path. Once ignored, these obstacles continue becoming weaker until they cease to exist, in which case uncertainty must work hard, much harder than your certainty to achieve its destructive goal, and when it works far too hard, to the extent where it cannot build more than one obstacle at any given time, then it begins to lessen the production of obstacles, thus making it easier for your certainty to progress beyond the daunting traps of uncertainty.

It is then that you begin to liberate yourself from uncertainty, and land on the path to becoming certain again. Today I felt quite uncertain about a graphic novel, Django Unchained, that I had received in the mail – I was certain that I had purchased the English version, however what I received was the German version. I was certain that they had made a mistake, however it was I that made the mistake by not reading “German” after the book title on the internet listing, in the brackets. Thus, uncertainty took over as I thought of having to learn German to enjoy this book, and now that I have found out that it will cost me three times the price of the actual book to post it back to the United Kingdom for a refund, I am positively certain that learning German will work out better for me, financially.

My certainty, having firstly been overcome by uncertainty, has prevailed and is now stronger than it used to be this morning. I am in fact quite excited about learning German. Perhaps this simple mistake and befuddling of my psyche from uncertainty might have put me on a new certain path.